7 Things I Loved About Her

After a restless night of fitful tossing and turning in bed, I received a call at 5:40am on Saturday, May 12th from my cousin - our Halmoni (grandmother) had passed away peacefully in her sleep.  When I got to her room at the home, she was lying there, so peaceful and relaxed, as if she knew that God was going to call her home that night... and she obediently let go.

This kind, generous, and loving woman lived with our family for a while when I was young and raised me up to eat healthily, respect my elders, and above all, to love the Lord and my neighbors, for they are also His.  Though I know the Lord has taken her and she is at peace, I still hurt.

I usually love making lists, but this was one that I never, ever, wanted to write up...  and though this list doubled as my eulogy to her at the wake, it's also a list that I ended up writing to comfort myself in all the lovely moments I had with her.

7 Things I Loved About Her:


1. She taught us how to eat well.  Our family reunions are the envy of the town!  My co-workers and friends would always go green with jealousy when I bragged about the sushi and Korean barbeque and "ko-nglish" feasts we would indulge in whenever Halmoni was to be involved.  Forget the marathon that you signed up for, ditch the diet, wear your sweatpants instead of your jeans - you're here to feast with Halmoni.  We weren't afraid to go up for seconds and thirds.  It was often usual to eat a fourth meal that consisted of potluck leftovers.

2. She loved to play.  I remember that one time when she came over when we were much younger, she had us look under the couch cushions and the car seats for pennies so she could fund her hwatu card games with all the other "high roller grandmas" in her apartment.  That day we cleaned out our couch was also the cleanest our couch had ever been - its condition's gone downhill from there.

3. She was incredibly popular.  When we used to attend the same church in Chicago, the adults had their service first and would go downstairs to eat while the kids had their service.  When my sister and I went downstairs to insah (bow in respect), we had to insah to the 20 other ladies surrounding her first.  All that bowing got our little heads so dizzy, but it was worth seeing her return our dazed grins with her own smile of approval.

4. She cherished her gifts from her grandchildren.  She kept every photo of her grandchildren and had her walls' worth of photos of awkward 6th graders and teens adorned with dental braces.  She would carefully store her prized brooches and makeup in the purple cosmetics box J-unni got her, and I often saw her wear the jacket vest from M-oppa and the clothes from S-unni, saying that they were the only things that could ever keep her warm - which was funny, because it always felt like 80 degrees in her room.

5. She knew perfect English.  ... okay, I lied about this one, but when you gave her a call and the only thing you could say in your feeble attempt at Korean is "Halmoni, numuh sarang hae yo", and the only thing she could respond in English was "I love you, I do, me too, you too"... it was perfect.

6. She was a leader of a gang - a gang of fierce women prayer warriors at church.  The would band together and pray earnestly and intensely for everyone in the church early in the morning.  Once, with a straight face, she told me, "I pray very hard for your husband".  I was horrified - not because I felt this immense pressure to go find a guy and marry him, but because I was only ten at the time.

7. She glorified the Lord with all of her being.  She glorified the Lord through her involvement with the church.  She would earnestly seek Him out at prayer meetings and pray for all of her 8 children and their spouses and their kids and their kids' kids.  She has like, 50 bajillion descendants - what a dynasty!  Halmoni was this incredibly bright light and witness to those she touched at church, at the gym where she swam every day, and her friends at her place back in Chicago.

After decades spent faithfully raising up a generation of bright children, serving her brothers and sisters at church, traveling the world, defeating stomach cancer into remission, and doting on her grandchildren, she has been called home by the Lord and obediently answered.  She will be incredibly loved and will be dearly missed.  But this isn't by any means a final goodbye.  It's more like, "thanks for being awesome, Halms.  See you later".